i wish for you
i sit here staring at the blank screen,
wondering if you're sleeping,
wondering if you're already awake,
wondering if you'll think of me,
and knowing the answer.

i wish...
for just one kiss,
for one embrace,
for one moment of your time,
for you to reach for me...

..as i've reached for you all these nights.

and then i realize...

you don't deserve me.

you don't deserve all that i would put you through.
you don't deserve the things i would expect.
you don't deserve the stress from my life.
you don't deserve to have to deal with me.

of course, none of this matters...
since we don't know each other yet.

Friday, Nov. 25, 2005 - 6:00 am

Heart Shaped Box

Last Five
thusly untitled. - Wednesday, Apr. 04, 2007
i wish for you - Friday, Nov. 25, 2005
untitled - Monday, Sept. 26, 2005
addiction - Monday, Aug. 22, 2005
the storm - Friday, Jun. 10, 2005

Buddies
%%buddy_list%%

Playlist
+ wind's nocturne from lunar: the silver star story
+ heart shaped box // evanescence
+ valentine // martina mcbride
+ don't stop dancing // creed
+ screaming infidelities // dashboard confessional
+ you were mine // dixie chicks
+ slow down // ben jelen
+ dare you to move // switchfoot
+ fukai mori // do as infinity
+ breathe no more // evanescence
+ gravity of love // enigma
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Diaryland

Girl
landa; eighteen; lesbian; kansas city; kansas; live with my daddy; baby named sango; kid named storm; crochity old lady kiddy; generally here hanging out or somewhere else with elsbe; love music; college freshman; undecided major.
Loves
elsbe; evanescence; inuyasha; rachel; cauterize; dashboard; daddy; sango; kiddy; music in general; gamecube; online games; block breaker on the cell; ashley; kristen; sai; mika; sheryl crow; katie holmes; women of substance; gravitation; what few friends i have; slight thunderstorms; cool rain on my skin in the summer; the feeling of falling in love.

Hates
boys who will never be men; men who will never be boys; homophobia; closed-mindedness; the feeling of falling away from love; seeing someone walk away; reaching for air; losing what little friends i have; fighting with someone; feeling like a mooch; severe thunderstorms; losing touch; feeling alone; living alone; always being wrong; crying.